Saturday 18 June 2011

DVD Reviews

WWE - TLC: Tables, Ladders and Chairs 2010
Starring: John Cena, Edge, Randy Orton
Clear Vision

Available Now
Review by Omer Ibrahim

TLC. The three letters that, in wrestling, stand for Tables, Ladders and Chairs, used to mean that you were about to see a group of men fall off of things, go through things and smack each other around with things. These days however, it’s the name of a Christmastime Pay-Per-View in which each match (save one) includes one or all of the weapons/hardware/furniture.

The show kicks off with a Triple Threat Ladder Match for the Intercontinental Championship as Dolph Ziggler defends against Kofi Kingston and Jack Swagger. The three men use the setting well and open the PPV with vigour. Kingston in particular always seems to excel when he gets to use props, but without resorting to garbage-style violence.

Up next is the Divas Tag Team Tables match. The Lay-Cool team of Michelle McCool and Layla take on Natalya and Beth Phoenix in a match that probably went a bit too long. That said, it’s a well worked match, and the girls do well thinking on the fly when the planned finish to the match fails when *Spoiler: Highlight to read* the bright pink table doesn’t break when it’s supposed to *end spoiler*.

The only match on the card not sponsored by IKEA is the Tag Team Championship match pitting champions Santino Marella and Vladimir Koslov against the Nexus representatives of Heath Slater and Justin Gabriel. The match never really gets going and is only meant to add to the Wade Barrett vs. John Cena main event.


Sheamus takes on John Morrison in a ladder match for a number one contender’s contract. Here’s something weird: during the match I must have been grumbling because my girlfriend looked up from her book and asked:

“You really don’t like him, do you?”
“Well, Sheamus is getting better, I...”
“No, the other guy.”

She’s right, John Morrison is really, really, annoying. This match is good, and should play to his strengths as he has things to jump off and over, as well as a powerhouse of an opponent to sell for, but he manages to suck all empathy out of the set up with his flat selling. Sheamus does an innovative job of working over his legs and he still manages to flippidy-flop all over the place like he’s forgotten he was in a match. Credit to Sheamus for some nasty bumps here...and for being the better wrestler.

The Miz defends the WWE Championship that he “stole” in a Tables Match against Randy Orton. Orton exacts his revenge by moving...very...slowly. This match was so good that I don’t remember watching it.

The other big strap is up next as Kane, Edge, Rey Mysterio and Alberto Del Rio duke it out in a TLC match for the World Title. I don’t need to say too much about this match, it’s a TLC and Edge is in it, therefore it’s a grueling spot-fest. Bump of the night belongs to Rio, who falls from a huge ladder in the ring to a single table in the aisle way. He hits it terrifyingly hard, and it’s amazing he didn’t end up in hospital.

So, it’s the main event and neither of the big championships are on the line. Instead, John “Superman” Cena takes on “Bland” Wade “Bland” Barrett (who is bland) in a Chairs Match. It made me avoid all chairs for a week, for fear of them boring me to death.

The Emotionally Fourteen Rating:
Sex/Nudity: Nope
Swearing: Nope.
Summary: 5/10
The Fifth Element
Starring: Milla Jovovich, Gary Oldman, Bruce Willis
Director: Luc Besson
20th Century Fox Home Entertainment

Available Now
Review by Blake Harmer

With Luc Besson’s excellent pulpy sci-fi actioner finally making the leap to Blu-ray, I’m really looking forward to seeing Bruce Willis kick HD alien butt and save the world from Gary Oldman and evil incarnate. But for fans of the film, is it really worth them upgrading to Blu-ray from the DVD special edition?

Thankfully, the conversion to Blu-ray has been pretty good to The Fifth Element considering the film is fourteen years old, now. The HD sound really adds to the music and action set pieces, with highlights being the diva’s song and the shoot out at Fhloston Paradise. The film has also aged well mainly due to its use of prosthetics over CG, and the CG that is used still looks good even under the scrutiny of the HD clean up.

Sadly though, there isn’t much else here to tempt fans of the film into upgrading. There are no new extras available here that can’t be found on the two-disc Special Edition DVD. Also, whilse the sound is infinitely better, the picture can only be improved so much, so when compared to an upscaled DVD, there isn’t a huge leap in picture quality to be enjoyed here. However, The Fifth Element is still as great as it was when it first came out, so whilst fans may want to think twice before repurchasing it, new comers should definitely check this out.

The Emotionally Fourteen Rating:
Plenty of guns explosions, kung-fu and alien blood to keep you thrilled all the way through.
Sex/Nudity: You get to see Milla Jovovich’s boobs, but that’s not exactly unheard of in cinema.
Swearing: Quite a few moderate swear words.
Summary: Despite some mild cleanup and HD sound, the lack of any new extras means there is very little reason to upgrade from your DVD version. However, if you are a fan and have a decent sound system, you will appreciate what they have done, and it is still an awesome film, so those who haven’t seen this should definitely give it a look. 8/10.

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