Monday 3 August 2009

"Social networking" sites can cock off

I’ve talked before about my absolute disdain for social networking sites, but I thought I’d weigh in again on some stuff that’s been pissing me off about them recently. From Facebook to Myspace all the way to Friends Reunited, social networking sites have taken the concept of social interaction and replaced it with an interesting new concept: social non-interaction. Ever had this conversation before?

“Hello mate, how have you been?”
“I’ve not been too good. Haven’t you been reading my Facebook?”
“Uh...No, I was hoping you’d tell me anyway.”

Seriously, it seems like everyone’s life is only available in digital form now. I quite happily have no problems admitting that I have a Facebook account. However, I use it as a tool. I don’t let it make me into one.
When I first got sent an invitation to join Facebook (and this was a WHILE ago, mind you – before it really took off), I thought “what a good idea; a way for me to see what all the people I’ve ever known have been up to without having to interact with them in any way, shape or form beyond a ‘hey, thanks for the add’ message when first adding them.”

Before too long though, I’ve been inundated with requests to join someone’s Mafia family or become a master poker player through the wonders of my internet browser. When did Facebook stop being an interaction tool, and become a website devoted to watching people dick around to record levels? Productivity in offices must have hit an all-time low since Facebook came along, as most of my friends who work 9-5 soul-destroyer jobs seem to update their statuses more at work than anywhere else. If you want to know how I can guess, it’s generally because the status update goes something along the lines of “Generic Person is bored at work lol”. Here’s a thought: DO SOME FUCKING WORK. That’s generally known to cure boredom, even if it is at the cost of your eternal soul.

And another thing; why the hell did I get sent an invitation to Become a Fan of “Not being on fire”? What possible person does NOT fall into that category? I can only think of one; the monk who set himself on fire in protest. Even then, I find it hard to believe that all the time he was burning, he was thinking “Oh, awesome! Awesome!” The sad thing is, though, that I actually became a fan of not being on fire for a while, because I actually thought that if I didn’t, it would have implied that I WAS a fan of being on fire.

However, even now Facebook trembles at the might of what is being tipped as the next internet phenomenon (or ‘Fad’ as I like to refer to them): Twitter. In all seriousness, my main issue is that someone seems to have looked at Facebook and gone “Yeah, I like all these ideas for stuff to put in, but I think it would be much better if you didn’t have to worry about all these applications”. Now, if that was all it was, I’d be a fan of Twitter (I’d even Become a Fan on Facebook). They seem, however, to have taken this further and taken it to a much less logical conclusion. “Ok, so we’ve got rid of the applications. Let’s leave the ability to update statuses and that’s it. Oh, and let’s limit the posts to the size of a text message, that’ll be handy.”

Ultimately, my issue with Twitter is the fact that it really doesn’t need to exist. For status updates, there’s Facebook. For 160 character messages letting the important people in your life know how you are, there’s...a text message. Letters work for that purpose too, and you don’t have to restrict yourself to any character length. Besides which, it costs 30p to send a letter anywhere in the country, it’s about the last bargain left on Earth. Last but not least, for good old-fashioned attention seeking, there’s always standing on a church roof with an automatic weapon. You could always ring 118 118 and cry down the phone as well, I suppose.

5 comments:

  1. Don't forget to follow us at : http://www.twitter.com/emotionally14

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  2. I know friends who live on facebook, as well as various online role playing games and at the end of the day, they are wasting thier life with no career or life plan (play until expire? Can you spend your whole life playing FFXI.. we will find out in 50 years. anw what will it get you in life.. a partner.. probably not.. health issues, more than certain). As long as they dont start wasting my time, then im alright with what people chose to do with thiers.

    i guess the solution to not get so fired up about it all, is to stop looking or checking such sites to find nothing has changed (and believe me it wont/doesnt. Or find an alternative method to reach the increasingly vegetated populus of this nation.

    I have found that ( a percentage of hardcore onliners) or 'humans' (pfft yeah) who you will contact on facebook for your event wont turn up anyway, simply because theyre spending the evening 'updating status'.. which as we know is new version of 'washing my hair'. At least 'Washing my hair' is slightly more hygenic than 'playing FFXi'.. so you have to ask yourself, dya want a nation of unwashed people at your events because they have sacrificed personal hygine for the sake of facebook, twitter and the like..??

    online social interaction, for me, has replaced actually SEEING friends.. I had the conversation the other day
    "hey not seen you for ages"
    "yeah, but weve spoken on facebook"..

    SO THATS A GOOD FUCKING REPLACEMENT FOR FRIENDSHIP IS IT? or has facebook allowed the lethargic friends (who'm we all have..admit it.. or maybe you ARE the lethargic friend?) have a perfectly sound fucking excuse to not get off thier arses and make some effort in human/social interaction..

    good luck to the human race, cos when it all goes to shit, possibly in the near future, the only thing we will be able to do is become a fan of 'the world NOT ending'.. as clicking 'yes' is all that we will be able to muster whilst Leveling up with some power orb or bollocks like that..

    or perhaps kids so disillutioned, they wont know what to do without the aid of a giant cursor above thier heads..

    KILL US..

    KILL US NOW.

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  3. and of course it's not equally as sad and soul destroying to arse about on here reading your oh so original posts

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  4. or replying..

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  5. like you did you mean?

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