Saturday, 21 November 2009

DVD Reviews


Bitten
Harvey Glazer
Brightspark Productions

Available now: RRP £14.99
Review by Rob Wade

Jack is a paramedic whose life just couldn't get any worse. His job is night shift, he can never get any sleep and he's taking abuse from all angles, from his tyrant landlady all the way to his bitch ex-girlfriend. That is, until he meets Danika. Found in a pool of her own blood and suffering from horrendous bite marks, she seems like she's hooked on something bad. Jack takes her in and patches her up, only to find that there is more to her than meets the eye...

This film was nowhere near as bad as I was expecting. Yes, the acting is decidedly ropey at the best of times (particularly during the film's emotional crescendo - some HORRIBLY cheesy dialogue there). Yes, the film is comprised of Jay from the Kevin Smith movies, a girl from one of the straight-to-DVD American Pie movies and a guy who wants SO badly to be Jack Nicholson it's shameless. Yes, the film has some seriously bad choices in technical direction. For example, every time the two paramedics are discussing particularly graphic sexual practises, everything is accompanied by a sound effect, from his buddy Roger telling him to "give her the shocker" receiving an electrical sound to the sound of a tea bag hitting a cup of water when Jack says he's going to...you've guessed it.

Despite this, however, the film is endearing in its own strange way. The dialogue at times is ludicrously funny thanks to Jason Mewes' seemingly endless torrents of F-bombs during the course of a dialogue, particularly when frustrated or panicky. The film isn't a bad idea conceptually, and isn't so horrendous in its execution that it is poorly made technically (aside from the sound effect issues). Plus, as straight-to-DVD movies go, this isn't actually too bad. The production values are pretty high, and the film is shot in a pleasant enough quality that it doesn't cause headaches.

Shame really, everyone loves a good "This vampire movie SUCKS LOLZ" joke.

The Emotionally Fourteen Rating :
Violence : Plenty of vampire bites, understandably, but nothing more than that.
Sex/Nudity : Plenty of tits and a sex scene, though it's hard to make out what's really going on.
Swearing : It's got Jason Mewes in it. What do you reckon?
Summary: A reasonable film, just entertaining enough to justify watching but let down by some unusual film-making choices. Maybe worth a rent if you fancy a chuckle, but certainly worth waiting for the price to come down if you're intent on buying it. 6/10

Mobile Suit Gundam 00: Volume 2
Seiji Mizushima
Beez Entertainment

Available Now - £34.99
Review by Blake Harmer

Whilst volume two of the Gundam Wing 00 series isn’t as impressive and filled with booty as the first volume’s special edition, you’ll be happy to know that the DVD is a lot cheaper. However, what it does retain is everything that is great about the first volume, from its complex plot, to its large amounts of robot carnage.

The plot carries on from the first volume and continues the escapades of Celestial Being and its attempts to bring an end to all war through armed force. However, there are lots of obstacles to overcome including a terrorist organisation that are trying to take advantage of Celestial Beings' ideals. Whilst another group is trying to steal the Gundam units.

Everything that made the first volume great is here: Lots of mech smashing, usually involving laser swords or large cannons of some description. There is also, a deep complex plot with excellent animation and artwork.

However, the downsides to the previous volume are also the same, as the plot can sometimes get a bit too political and I felt that it detracts from the source of the main enjoyment, which is large robots tearing each other limb from limb. However, when the robot killing is going on, Gundam Wing 00 is superb.

The Emotionally Fourteen Rating:
Violence:
Lots of robot explosions and destruction. Most death is normally down to explosions and you don’t really see any blood or guts.
Sex/Nudity: none that really leapt out at me, this is not a tentacle filled anime and is more aimed at a teenage to adult audience.
Swearing: some swearing but nothing to get hugely excited about. All profanity is used realistically.
Summary: If you liked the first volume, volume 2 carries on the story line and gives you more of the same. If giant flying mechs blowing the hell out of things, and an in depth plot is your bag, then I recommend checking this out. However, I highly recommend you see the first volume first if you are to have any chance of following the story. 8/10

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